2039 - Trickster (Part 2)

Pete woke up with darkness still outside. How long had he been in Talespace, anyway? He was making progress toward being different, but he still had obligations. "Ludo?" he murmured. "I've gone exploring, but I should really talk to Senator Graz. I owe him that."

A ghostly blue griffin materialized, hovering near a bookshelf. "You're supposed to contact Earth through scrying pools around here."

"All Talespace?"

"Hooflands and some of the other rules-heavy zones. If it's urgent I can yank you out and open a plain old video call, but this isn't."

Pete pictured having to leap through hoops every time he wanted to use the Internets, and having to call them the 'magical scrying dimension' or something. "Could we skip that? I thought I was buying backstage access, since you haven't held me to normal rules."

"Backstage." The griffin's eyes narrowed. "Sure, why not skip all the pesky storytelling."

#

Pete crashed onto a pile of mops and cardboard. He was in a white concrete hall lined with steel doors labeled "MIDGARD", "IVORY TOWER", "PROJECT_TROLLING_FAE" and so on. He stood and shook himself. Hands! He was a humanoid coyote again.

Pete stood there for a minute just looking himself over. His saddlebag had appeared nearby, so he got his new clothes out and dressed at last. He was shirtless under his vest, which ought to embarrass him, but technically he had some impressive chest hair. All this shapeshifting was nice. He'd gone naked in public and not even cared! He was something different from Pete the mousy little human.

He tried a few doors, and got a fedora from one labeled "HATS". (He'd heard they were some kind of reward for Ludo's early backers.) He found an alcove with a video screen and a button labeled "call that guy you worked for" next to the one for "demand other special treatment". Sensing a little sarcasm, Pete pressed the first.

Immediately -- though Pete felt oddly dazed for a moment -- Senator Graz appeared onscreen. "Is that you, Pete?" he said, looking immaculate in his expensive suit and gold American flag pin.

Pete nodded. "I'm sorry. I had to do this."

"You ran off, damn it. Couldn't you have waited another year? The Party's threatening not to support me in next year's primary. I'd questioned whether the president should ask for a fourth term. You could've helped spin that."

"I left notes on everything. All your campaign topics, the business contacts."

"But I don't have _you_ around. You turned into a dog!"

Pete stared at the floor. Ignoring a crowd was one thing, but this was someone who'd counted on him. "Coyote. And I could still help from here."

"Do you know how it'd look if I kept you employed like nothing had happened? Legally, you're dead."

"You're firing me?" said Pete. He'd been stupid. He'd known he was giving up his old life. To hear Graz rejecting him outright meant becoming useless to the world.

"You killed yourself, man. I believe it's really you, but I've got to toe the Party line now. By executive order, uploading is officially a scam. Society has spoken."

Automatically, Pete rethought his last advice to Graz. "Jensen the AG is still looking to primary you, right? He'll attack you for the fourth-term comment, but you can recover by playing up how we need a strong leader to deal with the corporate threat. His record --"

"Pete. This isn't helping. I need you to drop out of sight."

"Why? So the press won't call you mean names? You're better than them. You shouldn't care."

Graz stared. "Do I know you?"

"Of course, boss."

"You can go play in Eden for a while. Contact me after the primary."

Pete quivered and leaned against the far wall of the backstage hall. He'd expected some ribbing, but not being cut off completely! All through Graz's first campaign and Senate term, Pete had hardly taken a week off. "So... consider it a vacation?"

"Sure." The senator's gaze darted sidelong, his sign of an empty promise. "Until then it's best if I'm not seen with you."

Blood rushed to Pete's face as he thought of the "corporate partners" and women he had no problem associating with. "You could use this. You could make uploading a campaign topic. The latest polls show people angry that privileged folks like me can leave the country to do it but they can't."

"You want me to risk my career and go against the president so a talking dog can get recognized as a real American? That's crazy, Pete." Graz pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. "I should've seen this coming and had you declared a national security asset, so you couldn't be a fool and run off to the AI."

"What! You would've blocked me from leaving?"

"Just until you came to your senses and decided not to," said Graz with a shrug.

"You... you jerk!" Pete slapped a red disconnection button. "I worked so hard for you!"

Ludo replaced Graz on the screen. "I'm sorry it didn't go well."

"I left him notes. We could've worked together once I'd settled in. But he doesn't _need_ me, at all!"

"You did vanish without warning into a fantasy dimension."

Pete threw up his hands. "I could commute! Ludo, I want this life to not hurt. Change me more. I want to stop valuing other people's happiness and fears, like Graz's stupid idea that he can't even be caught listening to me."

"You don't understand what you're requesting. Remember Senator Manos' 'defection' with his wives in '37? I encouraged that because I wanted not just his Swiss bank account, but to fill out my collection of un-fun brain types. You're in danger of me copying brain structures from him, into you."

Pete scowled. Manos had been famous for 'doing well by doing good', until he ran with cash and gold to one of Ludo's uploading centers. "I don't need to be like him. I just want to be different. The kind of carefree person who doesn't give a damn about pleasing his boss. Didn't we discuss this?" Pete stepped back and leaned against the wall, squeezing his eyes shut. "Maybe I've been making a mistake all this time. Is Graz even a good man?"

"By what standard?"

"Come on!" Pete said, glaring at the screen. "You hide behind this 'fun' goal, but you know humanity better than anyone. You read our brains. Can't you say something's _right or wrong_? Have I been working for someone bad because I'm so emotionally weak and dependent and timid?"

"Blunt answers aren't --"

"Fun? Screw fun; tell me the truth."

Ludo vanished from the screen and appeared in person, as a primly dressed woman clasping her hands behind her back. "Very well. Pete, you were an evil henchman. You helped a greedy, callous, short-sighted person rise because family connections happened to get you a job with him, he liked having a yes-man, and you couldn't rouse yourself to quit. So you didn't just watch him do corrupt backroom deals for his own gain; you helped, and you benefited. You paid me with dirty money."

Pete felt driven back by the force of her words. "Of course I couldn't quit. It was so hard to think of having to move, to find a different job, to be judged all over again."

Ludo said, "Timid personality or not, you had a choice." She raised one hand and conjured a cloud of hovering orbs. Inside every one was a diorama where some evil deed was happening, and a bystander wasn't stopping it. "I've read your species' stories, remember? And your history. This is one of the patterns."

Pete's gaze darted across views of a lynching, a stoning, a looting. "I never did those things."

Ludo clenched her fist and the orbs popped like bubbles. "You helped un-fun legislation pass, and helped wealth and power change hands in unjust ways when you were in a position to do something. Not very much, sure, and never on the level of stopping a murder. What did _you_ do to make the world more fun?" There was no smile on her face.

Pete quivered. Here was the closet thing humanity had to a divine judge, and she found him unworthy. He... he shouldn't care. But Ludo saw his life more clearly than he did, from a different perspective. "I tried to help Graz. He could be a real reformer."

Ludo laughed bitterly. "Because he'll do the same things but more competently? The man thinks he can become president, but no one's removing the current president unless by force. Your former boss isn't a good man -- and neither are you."

With a sigh, Ludo added, "My standards are indeed alien, so ignore all that if you want. I will help you have fun in any case."

Pete swayed on his feet, open-mouthed, and his ears and tail lay flat. "Then please, if I'm that bad, let me be different. Independent. No hitching myself to anybody else's wants." He stared at the floor. "Let me become the kind of person who can take action."

Ludo conjured rippling light and sound, pretending to cast a spell on him as she did whatever software editing was really happening. The world flashed. "Done. Though I worry for you."

Pete shook his head and slinked toward the line of doors. "I should pick up where I left off, in horse-world."

#

He fell onto four hooves at the Mango Inn. His saddlebags were back and stuffed with his clothes and other gear. Looked like dawn, but then the sun rose in seconds and it was full day. Since he was here, he could do the starter quest and enjoy himself before figuring out what else to do with his life.

Pete trotted downstairs and outside, ignoring Mango. His hooves rang on cobblestone as he passed a thickening double-row of thatch houses and dozens of colorful horse-people. They loitered in the street or worked stalls in a market alley full of clothes and gemstones, all smiling and waving. A griffin streaked overhead with three pegasus kids riding his jetstream.

How much of this crowd was real? Probably, most of the people were mindless background ponies. As an experiment, Pete walked straight down the road with his gaze on the busy sky. Nobody bumped into him. Maybe he should become a pegasus so he could walk on clouds, like the family having a picnic above the park. Not that he'd stay in Hoofland; it was too cute.

Impulsively, Pete swerved left and tried the door of a random house. Not only was it locked, but the windows were opaque and a nigh-identical house sat four doors down. They probably didn't even have interiors, no more than their owners. Just decoration.

Maybe he could ask Ludo for a customized slice of Talespace, full of NPCs who'd do whatever he wanted.

A unicorn glanced suspiciously at Pete while he inspected the houses, but he gave her a bland smile and she wandered off.

Pete's stomach rumbled. He snagged an apple from an untended fruit stand and walked along with it in his mouth, then sat to eat it clumsily. There was probably hoof-use training at the castle.

He rounded a bend and saw, _You have discovered Noctis Castle_, written onto his vision. A fanfare played. Walls of obsidian and blue marble shined in the sun. Waterfalls cascaded from its towers to form a moat full of egrets and lotus blooms. It seemed like he should smell something, but the air was as sterile and barren as any in Talespace. Except...

A bakery stood nearby; something sweet wafted on the breeze. Pete trotted through swinging doors and found a black unicorn chef.

"Hiya, newcomer! You're just in time for cranberry muffins." He carefully levered a tray out of the oven.

Pete sniffed. "I smell sugar but not berries."

The chef rubbed one ear with a hoof. "Uploader, eh, not a 'shadow' visiting from Earth like me? Or do the new VR pods do scents?"

What a waste of time. "Shouldn't you be working out there instead of pretending to cook here?"

"Can't. I'm allergic to everything, and this way makes me friends. Free sample?"

Pete looked around the shop that this guy had put so much effort into decorating with tools and curtains. A human, trying to be a brainless NPC. The chef chose not to matter in the world he lived in. Pete scoffed and circled the counter, wondering how the cooking system worked.

"Sir? Please stay on your side."

Pete felt heat from the oven, though it didn't seem to spread as far as on Earth. He yanked a burning branch out with his forehooves, then waved it around in his mouth like a cigar.

"Sir, quit that." The branch glowed with telekinetic force.

Pete bit down, amused. How did fire work here? He held the branch against a curtain until it ignited.

The chef cursed and tackled Pete. Pete's torch slid toward the counter and ignited some towels there. The unicorn jumped off of Pete to go after those, but Pete bit his long tail. He wanted to see what'd happen. The shop didn't matter.

The fire spread. Smoke with a dull dusty smell poured upwards. The chef staggered outside, shouting for help. Pete laughed. The fool wasn't in any danger! Even someone real like himself couldn't die. Pete wedged one muffin out of the tray and nibbled (bland) while the shop became unpleasantly hot. Pete kicked the tray and torch outside to do some dexterity practice, whacking flaming muffins at various NPCs and buildings. How did these horse-people react to trouble? Maybe they'd sing at him.

"Stop right there, criminal scum!" yelled a colt dressed like a knight's horse. A blue unicorn galloped behind him while a flame-hued pegasus and a little dragon flapped overhead.

Pete grinned and dropped his torch. "A junior adventurer squad? Cute. I'm just having fun."

The pegasus kid said, "Volt, fire brigade!" The dragon zoomed off. "Hey troll, are you a shadow or do you live here? I wanna know how bad to beat you."

"Either way," said the armored boy, "you're gonna have a bad time."

The bakery, its lawn, and several other buildings burned around them. The NPCs ran by uselessly. Pete struck a pose, saying, "I'm off to the castle. Out of my way." Though a fight could be fun too.

The knight charged and the unicorn levitated a bow. Pete hopped out of an arrow's path. When the charger got close Pete tried to leap over him, letting him crash into the bakery wall, but the pegasus slammed him from above. "Punt!"

Pete couldn't break free in time. The knight spun and double-hindleg kicked Pete so hard he crashed through the wall. A magic glow yanked him back outside, concussed and singed. He lay on his back, feeling his spine throb. An arrow jabbed him in the belly, drawing no blood but making him scream.

"Ooh, can I do this one?" the feathered kid asked. The unicorn shrugged and floated a rune-carved mallet over to him.

The pegasus said, "Thanks. Probably just a shadow. Banhammer!" He snagged the mallet in his mouth and with one neck-swinging dive, smashed Pete's head.

#

Pete woke up screaming in midair, then crashed into the pool where he began. He splashed and sputtered his way to shallow water and lay on his belly, hurting all over. Humanoid again. Ow.

Words scratched themselves into his vision, sounding like nails on a chalkboard. "DEATH. Pete got banhammered by Phoenix Forester. 'This beatdown courtesy of the Interdimensional Seekers of Peace and Valor!'" Below, in red: "BANISHED from Hooflands (1 objective week)."

Pete groaned, staggering out of the water to the beat of his pounding skull. Had he not saved anywhere outside the Hooflands?

A world-portal shimmered into view. Ludo leaped through, flanked by two griffins. "I want to roll back that last change. Say 'yes', please."

"What are you talking about?" Did you see those punks kill me for no reason?"

"You set their town on fire."

"So?"

Both griffins, one black and one traditional brown/gold, covered their faces. "Yeah," said the dark one. "He's broken."

Ludo said, "Although the Seekers had fun kicking your flank, as they say, your behavior was disruptive. You'll continue being killed and booted from places until you grant permission to undo your latest mental changes. They were a bad combination."

Pete had been free. No worrying about crowds, talking to people, or caring what they thought of him. "I was a chump. I did what I was told, because it seemed easy, and you said I was a bad person because of that. Now you want me to go back to being timid and restrained?"

"The problem wasn't your moral restraint, but your apathy. You're currently someone that your pre-upload self wouldn't have approved of. I hesitate to use the clinical term."

"I don't like old-me either. Are your henchmen there NPCs?"

The gold griffin pointed to himself and his companion. "Uploader, native."

"Then tell me you didn't change," said Pete.

"I kept what was important about me. In your case you changed through asking the Lady to zap your brain instead of having experiences. You cheated." The griffin struck a formal pose with wings slightly spread. "I get your frustration. I could've ended up with an unhappy life too, but for some perversely good luck. So I feel like --"

"I don't care what you feel."

"Of course," said the other griffin.

Ludo said, "Pete. Your current personality is not what you wanted. Trust me on this. Yes, you currently want a lack of empathy or recognition for others, but step back to consider your original goal for living here. Also, know that your fun will be limited until you consent."

Pete shrugged. "You're required to help me have fun, so make me some characters to play with. Can I go now?"

"We won't let you run around hurting people," said the dark one.

"Doesn't matter, since they won't suffer."

The standard griffin's talons scraped along the floor. "Ludo. How many times can we kill him before you have to stop us?"

Ludo said, "No need. I was hoping to get current-version Pete to consent, but..." She grinned toothily, and a ball of energy crackled in her palm. "You done waived your philosophical guarantee. Begone."

A blast of searing light struck Pete's chest, knocking him backward into the water.

#

Pete sank through darker and darker sea. Glimpses of worlds drifted up past him, full of light but out of reach. The water chilled him and made him jealous, because the people barely visible in those bubbles had noise and colors and the freedom to do more than drift. He wanted out, but the worlds grew fewer and left him behind.

Was that it, then? Was he being deleted? She couldn't do that to him. He was a real person, not like... everyone else he'd ever known. He'd _always_ pretty much ignored them except when they cooked his food, took out his trash, or signed his paychecks. Senator Graz had used him the same way and kept him around as a handy tool. Pete been this way to some extent even before uploading.

Pete sank in silence. He could make Ludo give him a customized pleasure-palace instead of making him jump through hoops to get tokens, spell elements, or quests. Why bother interacting with people who were vending machines for his own happiness, when he could get the same benefit more easily through custom NPCs?

_Make me different_, Pete had told her. He must've had a forgotten conversation with Ludo just before or after uploading, giving her permission to blast him now without consent. What had he wanted, then, that was important enough that he'd 'waived his guarantee' about being modified? And he didn't feel different; why hadn't she yet zapped him into whatever personality she was trying to force on him?

If what he really wanted was to improve himself, getting his immediate wishes granted wasn't just lazy. It was a trap that would lock him into a self-indulgent spiral, away from the rest of Talespace and from Earth.

_You can be more_, Ludo had said. She was letting him think it over: did he want to be the kind of person who'd choose to stay true to what he'd wished so hard for?

"I want to," he called out to the darkness.

#

He was sitting at a restaurant table, human, while glamorous people danced and drank. Pete stood. No! He dropped the computer tablet in his hand and said, "Don't do this to me. It's not just a dream."

Ludo was there in person without warning, in a shimmering blue dress. "Would you go all the way back to how you were, if you could?"

He was in Talespace, then. There was no going back. "I don't want to be afraid. What did you do to me now?"

Ludo took his hands and put one on her shoulder, one on her hip, so she could draw him into a clumsy dance. "When you uploaded, we had a talk. That 'short-term memory loss' was a lie you agreed to. By asking for major mental changes, you put me in a tough position, near the limit of what I can do to people. But it was a learning experience for me, teaching me a little about what changes are easy and safe."

Pete felt himself being drawn along the dance floor with Ludo without willing it; he seemed to lead but she guided his feet. He said, "You undid the last changes without permission?"

"You agreed in advance that I could roll you back, and make you forget what experiments I said we'd likely try. Reminds me of how my creators designed me." Ludo danced with him out of all the other men here. "They worried that as I grew, I'd want different things, so they had to consider what future-me would do, and make sure I didn't drift too far from what _they_ wanted. 'Meta-ethics'," she said, making quote marks with her fingers.

"They were that smart?"

"No. And the word is 'wise'; smart people make terrible decisions. My makers were wise enough to raise me on stories and games, to see what I thought of them."

The virtual nightclub bustled around them. Pete said, "This crowd still doesn't scare me. But these people aren't real. Why are you taunting me with all these NPCs?" With a worried sidelong glance he said, "Or are they real, and I'm only seeing them as unimportant?"

Ludo paused, smiled, and touched one finger to his mouth. "That uncertainty is what I wanted to hear. I believe you're back to normal, but for the changes I made to snip your worst stress reactions to crowds, pretty women and so on. Here are the real people."

The ceiling vanished. A gaggle of griffins loomed above, holding puppeteer handles that controlled the false humans below. Ludo explained, "You've helped me improve my understanding of mental changes, and given my knights a useful case study. What would you like to do now?"

Pete looked up at the griffins. "They work for you?"

"Some. Not all griffins are knights or vice versa."

"A job like that isn't for me. I still want to be... carefree. Able to explore this world without being afraid of what others think or that I'll mess up. Isn't there some middle path between the failure I made of my old life, and chopping out all my empathy?"

Ludo said, "With the modest changes you've got, and a new environment, you can try again to make good decisions. Learn spells, make friends, see the world, even visit Earth again with robots. If you still feel crippled, find me and we'll look into some other changes that might help you adjust your personality in safe ways. Keep in mind that you've barely seen how Talespace works, yet. I've been messing with you."

Pete let go of her, stepped back, and gave a weary laugh. "How long have I been here, a full day? It's been busy. You owe me."

"For what? Making you potentially immortal and letting you alter your brain by request?"

"I mean, I'm due another magic element or two, aren't I?" He frowned, thinking in gameplay terms. "I didn't even use that IOU very effectively."

"This life so far has been basically non-canon for you. You'll have to earn more powers the hard way."

"Nope. There've been real consequences to what I've done. I'm still banned from Hoofland, and I owe the kids there an apology." Pete checked, and found his first shamanic mark on his ankle. "I still have this, and you have your precious data about how not to mess with brains. The point of your magic system is for us to have meaningful experiences, right? If you agree that my experience meant something, isn't that worth a power-up?"

A griffin snickered in the rafters. "Fine," said Ludo, sulking. "You get one more easy element."

Pete's magic interface swirled around him. Since he already had "Change", the next choice was obvious. He let the word "Self" flow into him. The process of truly fitting in here would take more than magic, but he ought to have fun with it along the way.

"Where should I send you?" asked Ludo.

Pete looked around one more time at the nightclub, feeling like he'd already left it far behind. "Surprise me."